Public Indecency

For as long as there have been boobs there seems to have been public intrigue and outrage regarding female breasts, and yes the double entendre of boob meaning breast and boob meaning stupid person was intended. Did you think that seeing 90% of Janet Jackson's bared breast was outrageous? Well then you are a boob. It was only one breast and the nipple was covered by a star shaped nipple shield. You see more breast a thousand times over during a good day at water world or a bad night at a skanky dance club, and in those circumstances it is all socially acceptable because the nipple is not exposed. But the Janet Jackson nippleless "Nipplegate" controversy of 2004 can hardly compare to topic that has always freaked out men, breastfeeding.

Today the American people are outraged at the startling news that pictures of Jamie Lynn Spears breast feeding have made their way into the public. The reports are that this has triggered a federal child pornography investigation, because Jamie Lynn is only 17-years-old. Now I know that American men are finally coping with their male impotency problem as is evidenced by the constant barrage of Cialis and Viagra ads spamming the NFL football lineup, but men still appear to be on an Oedipus complex induced hangover dating back as far as the legend itself, which would probably be about the 5th century BC. Believe it or not guys, childhood nursing is not a sexual act, nursing in public is not indecent exposure, and while the release pictures of Jamie Lynn's bared breast during nursing may be a gross invasion of her privacy, it is no way child pornography.

So all you stodgy old perverts and gray haired judges who get so uncomfortable when you see breastfeeding in public, because seeing a bared breast makes you feel like you are being violated or that you are being forced to be a voyeur who cannot help but fantasize over exposed boob, get over it and do not project some conservative agenda on our whole society just because you are insecure. In most cases breastfeeding is the healthiest method to nurish an infant or young child. As a society we must stop oppressing breastfeeding women and start promoting this practice for the sake of our nations youth. Jamie Lynn Spears should be commended for choosing to breast feed, especially after the horrific example of parenting put on by her sister Britney who fed her infant sons junk food. When they catch the Wal-Mart employee who stole the photos he should be punished for invasion of privacy, but stop with all of the child pornography craziness already. Breastfeeding is not only NOT pornography, there is nothing indecent about the act whatsoever. The ludicrous oppression of healthful child rearing in America is the true public indecency.